Thirsty and Dry

It’s the middle of summer, my favourite season and it’s been such a whirlwind this year. I’ve been so caught up in the activities and people and places to be, and the pressure to keep writing and create new content, and managing my household of active boys, trying to do “all the things,” that I haven’t stopped long enough to take stock of “me” and recognize why I just don’t feel like myself. But God has a way of speaking, breaking through the fog, when I haven’t tuned in long enough to hear the whisper.

Last weekend, my family packed a picnic, swim wear and life jackets and headed to Pine Point Rapids. It’s a place where the river runs over a clog of rocks, many washed quite smooth over the years, and if the water level is not too high, you can wade all across the river or slide down the rapids, like a huge waterslide. I haven’t been there in over 10 years and I was excited to take my boys to experience it. You have to hike in – just over 2 km through the woods. It was hot and humid, and there were quite a few bugs, so we were looking forward to being refreshed at the end of our trek.

But when we walked out of the forest into the clearing, we weren’t met with the sound of rushing water.

Instead, we were faced with bare rocks, and a tiny trickle of a stream on one side. The river was so low that there was barely enough water for even that. The one rock that used to stand barely out of the water that we used to swim against the current to get to, stood completely dry, like a silent sentinel surveying what was once a flowing oasis. A few puddles tucked into low spots, more likely filled by the rain than the river, were slimy and stagnant, and even the water at the edge of the river was brackish. The disappointment, especially for my children, was palpable. We would have to hike back, hot, tired, and sweaty to find somewhere else to be refreshed.

As I stood there, looking out over the bare rock, the words of Ps. 42:1 came to me and I realized – I was thirsty. Depleted. Empty. So caught up in trying to do it all that I was pouring from empty. No wonder I was exhausted!

I was like those falls. With just enough of a trickle to keep some water flowing, but not enough to be an oasis to share with others who are thirsty too. Not enough to be refreshing.

Without the force of the river, without its moving power, the water pools in pockets and puddles and lies still. There’s algae growing in those stagnant pools, a danger and cause for slipping.

The snatches of Scripture and prayer each morning before falling headlong into a busy day just aren’t enough. I need to slow down and savour, to be immersed in His Presence. Need to be baptized. Need to wade deeper into Living Water until I’m in over my head. I need the Spirit to rush through the dry bed of my heart and restore once again. Washing out the festering, stagnant places and bringing life again.

I feel like I’ve been down this road before and I wonder why I didn’t learn this lesson well enough last time. I used to read the Old Testament and be struck with how the Israelites could never seem to stay the course, always going off track. And I used to think I was somehow superior to them in my faith walk. But I get it now. Because we really are like sheep, going astray, and if not for our Shepherd who beings us back to green pastures and still waters, we’d be lost. Because we NEED Him. Daily. Hourly. Drinking deep of Living Water again and again. And that’s how it’s supposed to be.

So, I’ve decided to take a step back, to reevaluate the “why” for what I am saying “yes” to. To slow down, take the pressure off, and make space for rest. To be filled to overflowing. So, that the fullness of Christ in me spills over, becoming a life-giving oasis to a thirsty world. Just like He wants me to be.

Are you thirsty too, friend? Is it time to be immersed again? Take a moment to stop and listen, and maybe you’ll hear the whisper to come and drink deeply too.

Until next time…